My Friend Garth Feeney

Garth Feeney & I met early in our sophomore year at the University of Pennsylvania. He was a young engineering student not sure if his real future actually lay in the business world.

Dave Polesky met Garth in his junior year when Garth was providing supervisory services to a group of us doing a homework set together. Dave recalled that when Garth didnt have the answer to a problem, he had quite a network of connections that could eventually find a solution.

Greg Grimaldi, who was a year junior to us met Garth in engineering class, when they were assigned as lab partners.

The 4 of us were in the same degree program, shared many acquaintances, and became good friends. We were classmates, study-partners, homework-partners, lab-partners, and, at different points over the past 5-8 years, each roommates with Garth.

Together, we had our share of ups and downs during those critical formative years in College only in hindsight did we realize how lucky we were to take that ride together.

After college, Garths home or, more specifically his living room couch -- was often my home during my frequent trips to New York over the past 5 years.

During those visits, it was always a surprise how the memories somehow became rosier and fonder. Despite the fact that many of us practically leapt for the door on graduation day, a small lump still formed in our throats when we recounted our stories around a dinner table.

Although neither Garth nor myself were particularly fond of taking pictures (that was Daves role in our social circle), there are a few stray photos from those years floating around. One that I particularly cherished was a rite-of-passage photo I took of Garth showing off his brand new Brooks Brothers suit shortly before graduation & the start of his new job.

The photo was a study of contrasts -- it captured the ever-present child-like enthusiasm on Garth's face, the stern and upscale "Banker's Blue" of his new suit, all set against the impoverished, practically 3rd world surroundings of our college dorm room.

That photo also captures a glimpse into what drew us to Garth as a human being -- the comfort he had with his inner child. The inner child, being in touch or at peace with it, etc. are concepts that have become a little too popular and over-applied lately and as a result, its very difficult to find words that rise above the banal & the clich‚.

So instead, if youll indulge me, I would like to lead us all in shutting our eyes for a moment, as I paint a few of our favorite mental pictures of Garth that say far more than simple words could:

Picture Garths face as hes playing a new sport, or a game, or with his Yo-Yo, or whatever his latest obsession might be and think of the look of intense concentration and the from his heart focus he puts into it
Picture his look of triumph with fists in the air -- when he masters that obsession, solves a problem, or tells a good joke
then picture him running around preaching its virtues and enthusiastically trying to get us obsessed as well
Picture waiting for him hes probably a little late -- on a crowded street corner only to have him skid up in his roller blades with a big grin and hair flowing in the wind
Think about Garths quick wit & ready laughter even at completely self deprecating jokes
Greg has a mental picture from his days as Garths roommate in NYC. The two of them frequented an all-you-can-eat Sushi restaurant in the Village and did their best to get their moneys worth. Garth invented a verbal gesture which later signified all sushi restaurants where hed tilt his head back, open his mouth and flap his hand towards it like a fish about to go down the hatch.
Finally, Dave recalls an actual, very recent photograph of three of us posing in our river kayaks Garths latest obsession moments before plunging into the frigid upper Hudson River for the first time. Like a 10-yr old about to take his first roller-coaster ride, Garths face positively beams with excitement (in contrast with the slight hesitation on ours).

The simple, beautiful reaction that almost all of us have from these pictures is to fondly smile at the thought of the person that was -- and still is -- Garth Feeney.

The English language uses the terms widow and widower for a person thats lost a spouse, and orphan for someone whos lost a parent. It uses the phrase survived by to describe the children & family of the deceased. However, English does not provide us with an appropriate word to mark the passing of a good Friend and particularly one so young which is why these images are so important to all of us.

There are men who have walked on the moon, moved mountains, cured disease, and built empires. Garth rose above them all by bringing us laughter, companionship, and the smiles that we wear at this moment.

Although he may not have been physically with us for very long, the depth and quality of his presence and smiles on our faces as those mental pictures surface -- will with us for a lifetime.

Garth Thank you and God Bless you for being a part of our lives.

To Garths family, the people that brought him into this world and all those who made him the person he is Greg, Dave, myself, and Garths many, many other friends owe you a debt that can never be repaid.

Thank you.